Up until now... Gungho was pretty much the attitude. Back in middle school, high school, college, even in the military I learned if you go all out the results will come. Sort of like if you build it they will come. I never really had to watch what I ate, the closest to counting calories was having time restrictions in the ARMY, they didn't have awesome food choices but you only had 5-10min to eat if not less. Even then on cheat days we'd get sick from over indulging in junk food if we ever got our hands on it. That was a huge sign pointing to a major food issue. I don't know why I never saw a problem with that before. I know why, I was thin, muscular, and fit in my own eyes.
Unhealthy Thoughts. Even though I looked good at 143lbs, I was not the healthiest, I didn't care about what went in my body. I took ephedrine type diet pills, water weight reducers, drank, smoked even (I just thought I was cool) and wanted to be bulimic and even tried it out several times in highschool. I would workout excessively. I equated being thin with self worth and beauty.
I saw super thin girls thinking they were super happy and was never happy with myself. In college I once threw up every meal for a full 2 weeks or so. I thought that was weak and I a failure because the goal was to keep going. I just loved food and eating too much. I'd go all day not eating, then breakdown and eat a massive meal just to throw it all up. I'd party (drink excessively) to numb my feelings and mark the days on my calendar as a reward system.
As a little girl probably 6 or 7 I couldn't wait to grow up and take dexatrim. I'd seen it on commercials, saw fat people become skinny. Watch them go from sad to happy, and couldn't wait to be 18 to buy it. I even was disappointed when they stopped making it for health reasons. They now have different types where I guess they took out an ingredient but it's the same "magic pill" system. I was really sick (in the head) and those thoughts still linger even today occasionally.
I am a mother of 2 beautiful girls, because of them I don't want to pass this sick way of thinking on to them. They see me wanting to get strong and see me as beautiful, if I tell them it's a lie and I'm not beautiful unless I weight 120lbs then they'll think the same about themselves.
I saw super thin girls thinking they were super happy and was never happy with myself. In college I once threw up every meal for a full 2 weeks or so. I thought that was weak and I a failure because the goal was to keep going. I just loved food and eating too much. I'd go all day not eating, then breakdown and eat a massive meal just to throw it all up. I'd party (drink excessively) to numb my feelings and mark the days on my calendar as a reward system.
As a little girl probably 6 or 7 I couldn't wait to grow up and take dexatrim. I'd seen it on commercials, saw fat people become skinny. Watch them go from sad to happy, and couldn't wait to be 18 to buy it. I even was disappointed when they stopped making it for health reasons. They now have different types where I guess they took out an ingredient but it's the same "magic pill" system. I was really sick (in the head) and those thoughts still linger even today occasionally.
I am a mother of 2 beautiful girls, because of them I don't want to pass this sick way of thinking on to them. They see me wanting to get strong and see me as beautiful, if I tell them it's a lie and I'm not beautiful unless I weight 120lbs then they'll think the same about themselves.
My body is getting older and treating right is high a big priority now. I'm 30 soon to be 31 and my back feels much older. I can see where incorrect form for some exercises has inhibited me from some movements. I just started to do lunges correctly this year. After having 4 kids my abs have pulled away from my back so regaining a strong core is definitely key.
My New Philosophies...
- Consistency over Intensity
Instead of being so hard on myself to intensify my workouts I just want to get them done. When I think about getting in 5-6 workouts per week I want to revert and do crazy HIIT stuff every day. My body will shut down and I start freaking out the first day I miss one of the workouts. I then get so overwhelmed that I throw the whole week. It's backwards I know, but it's how I work. Instead I try to focus on doing something every day. I know not to do 2 Tabata Days in a row but I can do cardio on off days like walk away the pounds. - Cool it with the Challenges
Even though they've brought me great results, the momentum I thought would continue fizzles out. 2011 challenges included the Reboot juice fast, 30DShred, 60DSD, 30days of S5F, Winter100, and I almost agreed to start the 60Day Slim Down again, this is all since July of this year. I'm a nut for challenges!!! I get so hyped up and that energy to be in the group of those doing it doesn't translate to actually doing the work.
- Drink More
Drinking enough water has been a struggle for me all my life. If not exerting myself physically I may not drink one glass of water all day, instead I'll eat more and drink sugary juices and get headaches, feel sluggish, and moody. Really moodiness is directly linked to my water intake. That was hard for me to believe until I really paid attention. I have this water bottle with a straw (love my straw!!!) that holds 4 cups of water. Ideally I'll drink one in the morning during and after my workout and another bottle throughout the rest of the day. - Eat Clean Eat Right
I'd love to just go through all the cabinets, clear out the junk, and replace it all with only good food choices. I know Processed, MSG, and GMO riddled food entering my body and my family's body is like have a ticking time bomb set to 30 or more years. It'll explode with heart disease, cancer, and fat. I'll write more later about why I'm grateful to my fat. People think it's such a bad thing, it may be ugly but it's purpose is truly amazing. My fat has stored the toxins I've been consuming and kept them away as best as it can. It's my body's life raft. If you're in danger of drowning in the ocean you're grateful for something that floats and fat floats.
Moving forward my goal is to be healthy, I want to be toned and strong so I can fight an attacker. I want to run fast in case one of my babies needs me or is taken. I want to be healthy to put my back in the shape God intended it to be in when he made me. Our bodies are magnificently made and can heal on their own only when given the right tools.I want to be ready for anything, that's what living HappilyEverAfter truly means to me and I'm excited to get there and share here for others to join me.
♥Christy,
HappilyEverAfter
HappilyEverAfter
